Back to Your Heart
by half-goddess-Katia
Summary: Oneshot song fic. This is another side story for Trials of Life, this time based on Yami's thoughts. As usual, shonenai gay themes mentioned. Don't like, don't read.


Back to Your Heart  
  
AN: Hey all my loyal reviewers and readers! I'm so sorry that I haven't updated lately. I know this'll sound like an excuse, but just so you know I been having homework every day in my Honors English class and in Speech we have to give a speech pretty much every other day. Plus the fact that my next chapter or the one after it will have a duel of sorts so I need to do a little research on which cards Yugi has, I'm using my own for Selene's.  
  
Anyway, I thought I'd write this to keep you busy and also as an apology for not updating Probationis Vitae sooner.  
  
And I know many may think the artist of this song is rather stupid/silly, but I thought the song fit when I heard it again just recently.  
  
Disclaimer: I do NOT own Yu-Gi-Oh! or "Back to Your Heart." Yu-Gi-Oh! belongs to its creator and all associated companies and as I'm just a fifteen year old high school student I am definitely neither. And "Back to Your Heart" belongs to Backstreet Boys and all associated companies and, yet again, I am neither.  
  
WARNING: There ARE mentions of shonen-ai (gay/slash) themes in this story along with slight spoilers for one of my other stories. This WILL be easier to understand if you read "Trials of Life" first if you haven't already. You have been warned.  
  
Note: This is set one year after Yugi disappears. This is focused on Yami's thoughts on his hikari's birthday.  
  
~*~*~*~ = transition from song to story or the other way around.  
  
'...' are thoughts  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
It's not that I can't live without you  
  
It's just that I don't even want to try  
  
Every night I dream about you  
  
Ever since the day we said goodbye  
  
If I wasn't such a fool  
  
Right now I'd be holding you  
  
There's nothin' that I wouldn't do  
  
Baby if I only knew  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
It had been exactly one year since that terrible day. The day a yami and hikari had been separated because of the ignorance of one. And there hadn't been a single night when Yami hadn't dreamed of his hikari, and it always ended the same way. He'd wake up drenched in a cold sweat with tears running down his face, remembering the expression that graced his hikari's face as he'd said he could never forgive him. Even though that had never happened the dreams were as vivid as if it had.  
  
Yami's thoughts always followed the same pattern whenever he woke up from these dreams. He always thought of the "What if..."'s and "If only..."'s. What if he had seen how lonely his hikari was? What if Selene and the others had never come? If only he had realized his feelings sooner. If only he had realized his hikari's feelings sooner. If only he hadn't been so stupid.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
The words to say  
  
The road to take  
  
To find a way back to your heart  
  
What can I do  
  
To get to you  
  
And find a way back to your heart  
  
I don't know how it got so crazy  
  
But I'll do anything to set things right  
  
Cause your love is so amazing  
  
Baby you're the best thing in my life  
  
Let me prove my love is real  
  
And make you feel the way I feel  
  
I promise I would give the world  
  
If only you would tell me girl  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
'If I could just have one more chance to set things right I would, but I can't. He left and I doubt that he's ever coming back.' Yami thought, sitting up and burying his face in his hands.  
  
When he looked up his eyes unwittingly fell on first the clock, indicating that it was around three in the morning, and then the calendar. When he saw the day circled in red was when he realized what day it was. It was exactly one year ago to the day since Yugi had run away. And it was also Yugi's seventeenth birthday, his soul mate's birthday.  
  
Yami knew now that his hikari was his soul mate, there was no shred of doubt in his mind about that, and he wished he could see Yugi so maybe, just maybe, he could try to start to make it up to him. Start to make amends.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
The words to say  
  
The road to take  
  
To find a way back to your heart  
  
What can I do  
  
To get to you  
  
And find a way back to your heart  
  
Give me one more chance, to give my love to you  
  
Cause no one on this earth loves you like I do  
  
Tell me...  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Yami knew that if he ever saw his hikari again, he would do anything just to get one more chance. And he also knew he could never blame his hikari if he never forgave him, even angels have their limit. And he was afraid that he had pushed the limit of his hikari no tenshi too far for him to ever come back much less forgive him.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
The words to say  
  
The road to take  
  
To find a way back to your heart  
  
What can I do  
  
To get to you  
  
And find a way back to your heart  
  
I turn back time  
  
To make you mine  
  
And find a way back to your heart  
  
I beg and plead  
  
Fall to my knees  
  
To find a way back to your heart  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Despite this he'd be willing to get on his hands and knees and beg if it would bring his tenshi back to him, his Light back into his arms and into his life. Just so he could tell Yugi what he'd been too dense to realize before. That he loved him. That he truly loved him with all his heart, mind, body, and soul.  
  
If he could he would go back in time, before this whole mess began, and live that time over making sure that his hikari never felt alone. He'd make sure that he never abandoned Yugi. That he never forgot his tenshi.  
  
He was ashamed that it took something this big to realize exactly what had been going on. He was supposed to be Yugi's other half. He was supposed to know or at the very least have a very good guess as to what was going on in his hikari's life. Looking back on it, he now agreed with Selene. Even though she didn't straight out say it, he knew she must have been thinking what a fucked up yami he'd been, and she was right. What type of yami doesn't realize that he's hurting his hikari? Most evidently, his kind.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
The words to say  
  
The road to take  
  
To find a way back to your heart  
  
What can I do  
  
To get to you  
  
And find a way back to your heart  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
If he only knew how, if only he knew what to say, if only he knew what to do then he'd do it in a heartbeat. Anything to get his hikari back and lighting up his life again. He'd do or say anything at all to get his little tenshi back into his arms where he belonged.  
  
Yami sighed and lay back down, about to attempt to fall asleep again. As usual his last thought before falling unconscious was, 'I hope one day you can forgive me Yugi. I will wait for the day when I can finally begin to make it up to you. Even if it takes many millennia for the chance to come.'  
  
AN: So, what do you think? Please read a review and I'll try to get the next chapter of Probationis Vitae out ASAP, I promise. 


End file.
